How to start practice as a newbee

If you have never or seldom spank experience, this is a good start point to take both spanker and spankee to a healthy and win-win practice.  If you are a veteran, I still believe you could benefit from some advice in the article.

A spanker and a spankee should make an agreement prior to the determination to real practice. They need to talk candidly at the start of their relationship and clearly define those limits. e.g. What are the safe words? What is the level of pain a spankee can tolerate? Does a spankee want marks or no marks? What positions does the spankee prefer to?

These are necessary and much paramount especially for the first time practice, and also important for the subsequent spank practice.

Tip 1: respect spankee’s preference.

Although the spanking practice is guided by the spanker, the spankee’s pain threshold, favourite spanking scene should be fully respected. Before the practice, spankees and spankers should fully communicate about the desired position, the implement to use, if a bare bottom is objected by the spankee in the first time practice. Some spankers just want to find a lady' bottom to beat. They do not care the feeling of the spankees and they do not have any idea how much it would hurt with certain implements. In short, they just want to 'beat'. This will be not only dangerous but also awkward situation for a spankee; you don't want to visit a doctor with bruised buttocks!

Some spankees like being immobilized more firmly and spank harder when they squirm, so as a eligible spanker, you should exert more strength to keep them still and give them harsher discipline, if you give up when you spankee struggles a little bit, then the game is over. But be aware, this advice is based on the assumptions that both of you know the spankee’s limit and the spankee does not say the safe words.

 Tip 2: safe words.

Safe words are the words a spankee should speak them loudly enough to let the spanker hear during the spanking practice when she/he finds the beat/humiliation intolerable. Safe words can provide a protection for the spankee from being over hurt based on the assumption that the spankees is experienced enough and know their own limits.

The words can be anything both spanker and spankee are familiar so that the spankee can articulate clearly and fluently a, whilst the spanker can hear it and understand without difficulty, such as the spanker’s name.

So what about if both the spankee and the spanker are newbies?

Tip 3: do it progressively. 

Spankers are not mind reader, how can they to know what a spankee really need, and even spankees may not know exactly what they want. Spankees may have different pain threshold in their physical body and mental mind! 

Safe words would be fair way to prevent permanent injury to the spankees.  However this is far from enough for safe practice. Thinking of this scenario, if a spankee wants a hard spanking in her/his first times of spanking, she/he wants the bottom bruised with ripples, but the spankee actually cannot bear that physically. This is the gap between reality and expectation. In this circumstance, the spankee will be hurt too much which exceeds her/his corporal limit.

So, a qualified spanker should be able to do pain intense control, to go progressively across many times, not to bruise the spankee’s bottom on the first occasion. The first practice can allow panties on, and bare bottom should be mandatory in subsequent spanking practices.  Spankers should assess how much hurt can each implement exert and be cautious in using them. Implements should be used progressively across many occasions according to the hurt they can create, e.g. palm/hand and belts can be applied in the first few times of spanking practice, after a few times of spanking practice, spankees and spankers got more familiar with spankers’ limit, so that paddles and canes can be applied if palm and belt are far away from what the spankees can stand for. I used to leverage network cords on a spankee, but believe me, it is too powerful and may produce too much hurt on spankees, so I suggest not to use it too much.

To assess the extent different implements could hurt, it is recommended to experiment them in short sessions, e.g. spank with a cane on the spankee’s bare bottom for 10 times before the end of the spanking occasion and ask them how it is going the next day.

In summary, a spanker should bear in mind that the spankee may not know her/his own limit, the limit can only be appropriate figured out after a few times of spanking, so carrying out cautiously and progressively can guarantee not to cause permanent injury to the spankees, so that the game can last longer and both of you could acquire pleasure.

 Tip 4: embarrassment and respect.

During the spanking, ideally, the spankee should be submissive to the spanker, the more, the better both can devote to the scene and enjoy it. On the other hand, the spanker should take care of your spankee and respect him/her.  These are not easy to achieve and can only be accomplished over time with further interaction to build a mutual trust relationship.

Some spankers take it for granted that spankees should bow to them just because of their roles. This is totally wrong. A spanker should not be respected necessarily only for the role, and is not superior to a spankee. It is fair for a spankee to give a basic respect to a spanker at the very beginning and only submissive to him/her after the spanker can prove he/she is worth of further respect.

Embarrassment and humble are the feelings most spankees are after, not humiliation or shame. Most spankees despise being insulted or offended in their daily work and life, and this is the same when they are in the role of a spankee. Spankees want psychologically stress released, not the strike in their mind. So as a spanker, you must make a clear line between embarrassment and humiliation, to let your spankees feel embarrassed indeed while respecting them as an equivalent mankind.